Gone

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Sitting up in heaven,
I wonder why I died.
Why I couldn't seem to live,
No matter how hard that I tried.

Maybe it wasn't meant to be,
This life that I once had.
I lived not in infinity,
But in an eternity of sad.

I thought that you could save me,
So I reached out to only you.
But I didn't think you didn't know,
All that I was going through.

I thought we could cure each other,
Which was perhaps a bit too good.
You probably never thought to try,
Or even believed that we could.

I can only look down on you now,
I cannot touch or smell your hair.
It breaks my heart to see you,
Give an hour each night to prayer.

Perhaps you're asking God,
Just why I had to go.
Just why I killed myself,
(Although I think you know).

I loved everything about you,
And anything you ever said.
I'm so sorry that I'm gone,
Because I couldn't love myself instead.