I found myself staring at you, when...

You asked me what I was doing. Perhaps for a moment I found myself lost. Not lost within the beauty of your face, which is normally the case, but lost within the beauty of your person. Everyone goes through life, always searching for a person that will be special to them. I went so long feeling lost and alone, that once I finally found you, I didn't think that I could ever let go for any reason. That's why I find myself staring at you sometimes. I just get lost in how wonderful you are.

It isn't even about me when I stare at you absentmindedly. It's all about you, and what you stand for in my life. It isn't just a person who I can say that I love. It isn't just someone to keep me company, since without someone I am alone. I could have that kind of company at any point in my life, but I never wanted it. I always wanted to wait for the chance to get something much greater, and I hope that I have. No, I'm almost certain that I have. I'm almost certain that I've found you.

Everyone has their own opinions on what is needed to make it work, and tips for enduring long years with someone. Everyone has their own plan for a successful relationship with another person. But I don't think of any of that when I stare at you. I just stare at eyes which I once dreamed of, and a face that I often fantasized about endlessly. Time stands still in this state, and I find that the world spins around me underneath my feet. I don't even know how long it goes on for, since I am being swept away by who you are.

I wouldn't call this love that I feel when I stare at you. I feel that passively, now. I cannot quite describe it, which is why it probably intrigues me in such a way. I feel bad because I cannot confess this feeling that I have when I stare at you, and yet, I'm not sure either of us would understand if I did. Perhaps I'm reaffirming my existence in the world, an existence proven valid by you. People gain a reason to live through other people. Without other people, there would be no other reason to continue to go on. We rely on each other, and the kindness and love from one another, to thrive. So I rely on you to thrive, and I hope too, that you feel you can depend on me to be there for you. So that we can thrive together.

So I know you asked me why I was staring at you, and I know that this explanation was a little long, but that is why. That is why I stare at you, with my trance-like gaze and quizzical mouth which could be both a smile and grin all in one. That is why I stare. So I can even for just a moment out of the day, remember the person that I cherish most in this world. Remember the person which keeps future dreams alive, and buries past nightmares. Remember the person that, I hope, will always be there. To love, and also, to be loved.