falling in slo-mo

plummeting towards the ground
with my heart in my throat
and my hands outstretched
desperately denying their fate.

i am fully ignorant
of the events before this moment.
how i came to be here,
falling in slow motion.

just before that moment
where my hands hit the pavement,
and my radius and ulna crack in two,
i wake up in a cold sweat.

for a moment i think i'm still falling
before being called back to reality -
an alarm clock flashing 9 a.m.
and a new day to live.

i try to remember why i fell,
what subconscious part of my mind
is telling me to take a breath
and look around at my life.

like holding sand in my hands,
the memories of why i fell
slowly disappear in to nothing.
so tantalizingly close,
yet so many birthdays away.