i have a quiz in the morning and i should probably go to bed. i need to get a good grade on it. if i get many good grades in my classes i can get a piece of paper. this paper will get me a job. the job will put food on the table. who will be sitting at the table? maybe it will just be myself. maybe a friend if it's a weekend (probably not). most likely just my parents if they want to visit. it might even be thanksgiving, or Christmas. My birthday? i shudder at the thought.

but back to the food. it's sitting on the table. i need it to survive, but i need money to buy it. i get this money from my job, which i got from my piece of paper. but what else do i need? laughter, happiness, joy, excitement, titillation? lov...

i got the piece of paper from good grades. it's why i went to school. it's why i'm here now. get up. eat. get good grades. eat again. sleep. fill in the gaps with nonsense, but not the college experience. not meeting new people. not broadening horizons. not overcoming my embarrassing level of shyness. no, i must never do that.

i must never.
a fool,
am i.